Whoever invented the word procrastination was an evil genius. Dictionary.com tells me that the word is of "unknown origin." Of course it is because whoever created it felt the need to cower somewhere in shame at the horrible condition he'd unleashed upon us all. Since the term originated in the 1500's, though, this malady has long been plaguing mankind and is certainly here to stay.
I say that the coiner of this term was both evil and a genius because while I hate to procrastinate, I also love to do the very thing I hate to do. As a teacher, I epitomize the irony of my existence because on one hand I give out assignments and tasks that I want my students to complete on time, but on the other hand I continually put off my more onerous tasks until the very last minute and then privately chastise myself for being such a ninny. I tell myself to listen to my own advice to get my work done on time, and then that little smart-ass that resides inside of me flips me off and goes for a walk with the dog or checks out recent Facebook posts instead. It's maddening, I tell ya!
Procrastination sets in and takes a firm hold on my life as each school year draws to a close. The nearer that final school day comes, the more I find myself scrambling to complete all my work, so that I can actually leave and enjoy my summer. Perhaps it's because I am a teacher that I've become such a horrible (or terrific, depending on your outlook) procrastinator. Since I know there is a definite ending to my school year, I have an actual date up to which I can continue to procrastinate, and my subconscious knows this and convinces my smarter, but clearly not wiser, side to not worry about certain things until that final day. It says, "Chill, girl. You still have two and a half weeks. That's plenty of time to get it all done, and then just think, you get all summer after that to worry about the next school year." Then, of course you know what I do all summer, right? Yep. I just procrastinate worrying about the new year until the day before the new school year begins! Aargh!
It would be one thing if I only procrastinated at work, but NOOOOO, that's not how I roll. If you've read any of my earlier blog posts, you know that I procrastinated a full five years before I filed for divorce, and I'm still kicking myself for that one. I constantly procrastinate when it comes to dusting my house because I HATE TO DUST, so it's just easier to put it off -- easier, not cleaner, just easier. I even procrastinated writing a new blog post even though I love writing. What the hell is wrong with me?
I know some of you will be saying, "Damn, woman, cut yourself some slack. You are a busy mom, teacher, coach, writer, etc. Some procrastination is normal." This is true, so thank you for being so understanding, but then I come back to the same thing I tell my students -- we make time for what matters. Now, I'm the first to admit that dusting does not matter, not even the slightest bit, so I don't feel at all guilty for neglecting the dusting of my house, but my job matters and writing most definitely matters, so clearly I need to get my shit together a little better and stop procrastinating with things that are important.
Ultimately, my life goal has always been and continues to be becoming a professional writer not a professional procrastinator as I seem to have become instead. I can come up with excuses after excuses as to what has prevented me from becoming a professional writer by now just like I can come up with excuses for not dusting my house or grading that stack of papers, but in the end the only one who truly suffers is me (and all those potential readers I'm letting down!), and I've really been suffering a lot lately from the effects of this nasty addiction called procrastination.
So, I'm committed to kicking the habit. No more putting things off! My new motto is Do It Now! There, it's permanently written both in this post and in the dust of my dresser. So, procrastination, Shtick This!
